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For Adults — Stress Reduction

What Is Gratitude and How to Practice

Hannah Larson

Licensed Professional Counselor

Last modified 18 Apr 2024

Published 18 Apr 2024

The Power of Gratitude

Research consistently shows that those who focus on gratitude are happier, feel more optimistic, and have fewer doctor visits. 

When you are focused on gratitude for those moments, you no longer experience anxiety, depression, or other negative feelings and thoughts. 

What is Gratitude?

Gratitude is the practice of noticing what is going well in your life, feeling thankful for an act of kindness, and noticing the love and support that has been given to you.  

Why Gratitude Matters

Research abounds that our brains tend to notice what has not gone well and the negative. For example, if you were on a trip and the first five days were amazing, but something bad happened on the last day, you are more likely to remember your trip as not going well. It often takes just one negative experience for that to become your focus. 

Gratitude helps train your brain to recognize the good that is taking place in your life. 

Recognizing the support you receive, acts of kindness, and gifts of love can help you feel less alone and better about yourself and your life. 

Since our brains are wired to notice what is not going well, acts of aggression, disappointment and heartache, becoming grateful allows you to notice what is going well. 

The Biggest Way to Incorporate Gratitude Into Your Day

The biggest way to incorporate gratitude into your daily life is to verbalize your feelings of thankfulness to people around you. 

Be specific about why you are grateful

Being specific about why you are thanking someone has the biggest impact on both you and the person hearing you.

It is important how you express gratitude. Saying a generic thank you to a group of people at the bottom of an email is often not going to land. The person receiving the email will not know if you were thanking them and will most likely think you were thanking someone else. 

If you want to do a mass thank you at the end of an email, thank specific actions. For example, note how you saw different teams work together to achieve an outcome and you are grateful.

Here is a list of people to consider as you explore this practice of giving specific gratitude on a daily basis.  

Express your gratitude to your co-worker or staff 

Research shows that when you consistently say thank you to your co-workers or employees they are more likely to work harder, have higher quality work, and enjoy working with you. 

Sometimes, your gratitude might be for a small task. For example, you can reply to a calendar invite saying thank you to your co-worker for creating the invite. 

You can express gratitude to your coworker or employee by sending an email of thanks and including higher-ups on the note of appreciation. You can write a card and send it to your employee. When you are meeting in person, remember something specific your teammate or employee did and thank them for that specific action in person. 

Expressing gratitude to your co-workers improves your relationships, increases work productivity, and makes your workplace more enjoyable. 

Express gratitude to your partner or spouse 

The happiest and healthiest relationships have one thing in common: gratitude. Research demonstrates that people who are happiest in their relationships express gratitude frequently. 

Research shows for every negative reaction, there needs to be five positive feelings or interactions. Stable and happy couples show more positive interactions than negative ones. 

Look for things going well in your relationship and tell your partner about them. You don’t have to wait for your partner to go first. Keep at it and see how it changes your relationship. 


Try sharing your appreciation for these activities 

  • Mowing the lawn
  • Putting the kids to bed
  • Making dinner 
  • Taking out the trash
  • Giving you a hug
  • Picking something off the floor 
  • Taking the time to listen 
  • Going to the store 
  • Gardening 
  • Encouragement offered 
  • Remembering a small detail 
  • Getting the taxes done 
  • Paying bills 
  • Folding laundry 
  • Picking something up 
  • Doing something that made your day a little better
  • Being your partner 
  • Bringing you a drink 
  • Going to dinner with you 
  • Showing you acts of kindness 
  • Making an appointment 
  • Watching the kids so you could have time for work, to be alone, or be with a friend 

Express gratitude to your child 

Look for ways to share your appreciation with your child. Let your children hear you express gratitude to them and others. By modeling gratitude to your child, you are letting them know the goodness you see in them and others. 

With your child, express gratitude for the effort they bring to a chore, project, sport, or classroom assignment. Noticing and expressing gratitude for your child’s effort encourages your child to work hard and keep persevering in times of difficulty. 

Express gratitude to your child when they do something that makes your life easier. For example, thank your child for putting their coat in the proper spot, starting their homework, helping with dinner, helping a sibling, etc.

You may feel that you shouldn’t have to thank your child for things that are supposed to be done. However, taking time to express your gratitude can be powerful. Acknowledging and saying thank you helps your child know that you noticed, and it increases the positive bond between you and your child. 

Express gratitude to someone who has made a difference in your life 

We didn’t get to where we are today without the help of others. 

Take a moment to email, write a card, or post on social media to thank someone for the difference they made in your life. Remember to include specific details. 

 

Ways to Incorporate Gratitude in Your Life

When you park your car, take a moment to notice what has gone well in your day 

When you arrive at your destination, before leaving your vehicle, take a moment to pause and notice something good that has happened in your day.  

Our minds will often notice the negative. It is important to pause momentarily and see what is going right.

When leaving your vehicle, take a deep breath and notice something that went well with your day. Consider placing a cheerful reminder in your car to help you practice this gratitude moment.

Before going to sleep, find gratitude for five things 

Just as you are about to fall asleep, do you find yourself worrying about the next day or what didn’t go right in your day? 

Focusing on positive things before going to sleep will improve your quality of sleep. Take a moment to reflect on your day and say thank you for what went well. 

What you are grateful for can be very simple. For example, maybe you are grateful for your fridge that keeps your food cold. Maybe a friend picked up your kids so you could make a meeting. Find gratitude for those who spent the day with your kids and enriched their lives through education or entertainment. 

Even during the worst days, there are moments of gratitude if we can pause for a moment and notice them. 

Gratitude Challenges to Try

Keep a gratitude journal

Have a journal on your phone or on your nightstand where you keep track of those extra special moments of gratitude. 

Take a few minutes to think about your day. Maybe your Mom stopped by with dinner, or a friend called on a bad day. Write it all down in your journal. When you are struggling, go back and read those moments. 

Turn complaints into gratitude

When you catch yourself complaining, try to reframe the complaint into gratitude. 

For example, if you are upset about the traffic, remind yourself how grateful you are to have a vehicle that gets you from point A to point B. If you are feeling frustrated with a friend or family member, consider the positive things you appreciate about this person. 

At first, you might find your mind is blank when you try to think of something positive. Keep with it, as continued practice can make a difference. 

When you are participating in an activity, find gratitude 

If you are in a meeting, working out, or out for coffee with a friend, spend some time noticing all the things that are going well in this moment or in your life. 

As you drive to work, you may think about all the moments in your life for which you are grateful. 

It is so easy for our minds to do the opposite and think about all the missed opportunities and regrets. 

Make Gratitude a Daily Practice

Your Cadey mobile app has videos you can watch and practice to make expressing gratitude part of your daily routine. 

Gratitude has many benefits for you, and Cadey is here to support you.